We’ve all been there. One minute you’re nicely stalking Facebook friends and the next you find yourself added to a mommy group! At first it seems like a wonderful place to meet new friends, ask important questions and vent about your toddler. Then you innocently click that infamous “read comments” button and shabam! You’re sucked into World War 3, mom edition!
It’s terrifying, these mom groups. They’re meant to be supportive but I have yet to come across one that truly lives up to that objective.
Don’t get me wrong, there are many lovely mother’s in these groups. Mother’s who care and are kind and who genuinely want to help. But my goodness, there are a lot of the exact opposite!
Would you like to argue about your toddlers penis, shot schedule or whether or not your pregnancy test is actually positive? Then these are the groups for you!
You definitely meet some interesting individuals when enough moms group themselves together in one place. Let’s break down all the lovely personalities of mommy group moms!
- The silent mom. These moms exist but you would never know it. They sit back in their comfy chairs while their children nap and they watch the show. They laugh, they cry, they complain to their husband’s but they never comment. They enjoy the fight from afar, it’s safer that way.
- The nice mom. These moms are never confrontational. They are the optimists, the encourages, the voices of reason during sticky arguments. They make you realize humanity is not lost.
- The helpful mom. These moms are simply here to state some facts. Nothing mean is said, unless taken in the wrong context. They love to give solid advice with solid evidence and then they calmly bow out. Leaving you to make your own damn decision (like it should be).
- The argumentative mom. These moms will purposely post their opposite opinions because who doesn’t like a good fight. They like to instigate, it keeps them young and on their toes.
- The pusher mom. These moms want things their way. If you don’t agree, too bad! They will keep pushing the subject till their fingers bleed.
- The offended mom. These moms are offended by everything they read. Even if the comments or posts aren’t directed at them they still feel like they are being directly targeted.
- The mean mom. These moms don’t know when to stop. They will keep commenting until they get booted from the group.
- The I’m telling mom. These are the moms that tag every admin in the group in order to either call someone out or put a stop to an argument that is getting too heated.
- The, I’m done mom. These moms usually end up removing themselves from the group because they are just done! They can’t even! This isn’t what they signed up for! And everyone else sucks!
- The emotional mom. These moms are usually part of the nice mom groups but are generally much more emotionally involved in any sad situation. Are you experiencing a bad day? Well so are they! You guys can team up and give some emotional support to each other because God knows we all need that after reading through some of these mommy posts.
- The depressed mom. These moms are always sad. They always have something terrible going on and you often wonder if the police should be called to handle whatever is actually happening in their lives.
- The group admin mom. These moms are the actual creators, mediators and booters of the group who also happen to be moms. They get a gold star in my book because anyone crazy enough to start a mom group knowing what usually ends up happening is a hero in themselves. Seriously, you women are strong for enduring all that estrogen!
These groups are cray cray with a side of face-palm! But you know you can’t turn away, it’s way too entertaining! Plus, every once in a while you find out what that weird rash is that your 2-year-old has and that makes it all worth it…for minute or two.